It's easy to go over the top when you set your bar so low

Work just keeps getting better.
The top client representative just stopped by Humpty's desk and commended him on getting here so early this morning. I sprang out of my chair, those were fighting words. I arrive at least an hour before he does and I do at least 75% more work than he does. I walked into his shared office and just stood there mouth agape while the 5 or 6 people were all talking him up for being here so early this morning.

I said nothing, I just dropped my head, spun around and went out to smoke a cigarette. On my way out I resolved to take the rest of the day off but then I remembered I have to go to the damned auto parts store, buy a part with my own damned money (and then wait 5 weeks for the expense check to come back,) then go to the grocery store and buy 5 gallons of vegetable oil, once again my own money, my own wait to get the money back....

Fuck this place straight to hell.
Fuck everyone
Fuck everything
Fuck you
Fuck me.